Human

Tits, Swords and High Adventure!

Kirk — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 15:40:38 -0400

There are many great things about Conan The Barbarian. Sadly, it's suit-up scene isn't one of them. What may, at first glance, seem to be a perfectly acceptable scene quickly becomes a disappointment upon further study.

Locker rooms, bad centerfolds, and the United States Colonial Marines!

Dennis — Tue, 26 Aug 2008 17:58:51 -0400

I think it's only fitting that my first review here be for my all-time favorite movie of all-time. (notice it's so badass that I even squeezed the words 'all-time' into that sentence twice!). Yes, ALIENS. I guess I''m not that unique. It seems every party I go to I meet at least one person who agrees with me. Mind you, not that I walk around interrupting conversations to interject and ask people what their favorite movie is. No, I have a form I hand out at the beginning of the party like a ballot. It's much more thorough and people have a tendency to be more honest.

Proof that what should be obvious isn't always so

Kirk — Sun, 07 Sep 2008 18:08:03 -0400

We should all be honest here, the only reason anyone saw this movie was because of the title. I know that is the case for me. I didn't expect much when I saw it other than some gore and some bare breasts. In fact, I assumed they wouldn't even be able to succeed at a including a suit-up scene.

Kill em' for me Marv. Kill 'em good.

Kirk — Sun, 14 Sep 2008 01:03:32 -0400

There are several things that make the suit-up scene in Sin City stand out from it's contemporaries.

First, it doesn't all happen at once. Some people might think that this qualifies it as multiple suit-up scenes but since Marv (Mickey Rourke) is preparing for one fight across this time-span I'm qualifying it as a single scene.

Second, a portion of it is a direct representation of panels from the original comic book. I've included the panels from the comic in this review for comparison.

"Realism" is a term rarely applied to suit-up scenes

Kirk — Sun, 14 Sep 2008 20:51:00 -0400

Ask anyone to describe what Batman wears and after they describe the cowl, they will mention the utility belt. Batman's utility-belt is one of the most important aspects of the character. Combined with his prowess as a detective, his belt allows him the chance to compete with more powerful, and arguably useful, heroes. For some reason, Christopher Nolan has made a habit of overlooking Batman's detective skills, thankfully he has given the belt, and the gadgets it contains, plenty of screen time. This is proven during the film's only suit-up scene.

Word of advice, shithead. Don't you ever wake up.

Kirk — Sun, 14 Sep 2008 22:02:40 -0400

This is currently one of my favorite scenes for several reasons.

I love that it takes you by surprise. I put in Kill Bill Vol. 1 for the simple joy of watching it. I didn't consider that it would contain a suit-up scene, let alone one that is so wonderfully shot. What makes it even better is if I had been looking for a suit-up scene in this movie, this is certainly not where I would have looked for it.

"What are you gonna do, just walk in and arrest the whole village!?"

Dennis — Wed, 17 Sep 2008 17:23:49 -0400

When I first heard about the idea of this site, and that I'd be a reviewer for it... I wet myself. This was sort of embarrassing, as I was receiving fellatio at the time. Why I'd answer a phonecall from Kirk, during a blowjob, is beyond me. But hey, when the batphone rings... I answer.

War, huuuh! Good God, Ya'all!

Dennis — Wed, 17 Sep 2008 18:35:49 -0400

"I'm Gonna Git You Sucka" is director Keenen Ivory Wayan's nod to the great black exploitation films of the 70s. For this reason, he littered the film with stand-outs of the genre, including Jim Brown, John Vernon, and the recently deceased, Isaac Hayes.

The plot is your typical set-up. New guy comes to town, finds out things are being run by... (drum roll)... a villain named Mr. Big. Decides he's had enough and recruits some old buddies to go fuck some shit up.

Un juego complejo de Luchador encima de la escena de la película Nacho Libre!

Brian James — Wed, 17 Sep 2008 21:02:26 -0400

The film's opening credit sequence contains a smart, effective suit-up scene that takes an unexpected twist. A young Ignacio (Nacho) opens a dresser drawer containing icons, religious comics, wrestling action figures, and a holy bible.

"It's Not War, It's Just An Excercise In Teamwork And Tactics"

Dennis — Wed, 17 Sep 2008 21:18:21 -0400

I'm breaking the laws of this site and possibly putting my ass in the sling with the cruel and unforgiving webmaster that is Kirk Clawes. I'm reviewing a scene from a TV show. But dammit, this isn't just any TV show. And dammit, it's worth it!

Who knew a bow & arrow could be so destructive?

Dennis — Wed, 17 Sep 2008 21:39:29 -0400

Jesus, this movie came out in 1985!? Am I really getting that old? I can remember seeing this in the theater with my family, and thinking it was the greatest site mine eyes hath ever behold. What kid didn't want to be John Rambo after this movie? What kid didn't want to hide in a tree, in the middle of a thunderstorm, and then shoot his neighbor with a bow and arrow and then watch him explode? (not saying I did this of course...)

Sexy, Cheesecake-Kung-Fu Suit-Up!!!

Brian James — Sat, 20 Sep 2008 00:20:58 -0400

The introduction sequence to sexy super-thief, Christie Allen, in the motion picture D.O.A (Dead or Alive) contains a stimulating, id spinning, suit up. I have been audience to numerous styles and genres of films spanning from the early 1880's (when cinema hypothetically began) to the present date (9/28/08) and this one taps into the very core element of what makes a suit up scene.

The scene begins in the ultra posh, Hong Kong hotel suite of the English accented cat burglar...as she showers...

Ash Vs. The Evil Dead

Brian James — Sun, 28 Sep 2008 18:53:52 -0400

Let's take a look at a suit-up scene from the movie that inspired this reviewer to commit his life towards realizing a career as a writer/director.

Ammunition, Grenades and a Pocket Protector!?

Dennis — Sun, 28 Sep 2008 20:42:47 -0400

For the past few weeks now, I've seen the image of a pocket protector being tucked into a top pocket. I woke up in a cold sweat the other night thinking about it. I felt it like a phantom, resting against my chest when I'd go out wearing a shirt with a pocket on the chest. I even accosted one of the salesman at Geek Squad the other day, when he smirked at my dilemma and responded back with a snarky comment.

I knew this image fit into a suit-up scene... but which one?

Too Fast Forwarded

Brian James — Sun, 28 Sep 2008 22:23:26 -0400

Paris, France 1969. A futuristic spy film is being made. The moon 2001. Stunningly beautiful agent Codename Dragonfly gets suited up to infiltrate Mr. E's moon base in a skintight, pink spacesuit!

One star?

The scene suffers from the scene within a scene structure that comes in and out of the entire film. The film within the film's director, played by Jeremy Davies, is reviewing the suit-up scene in the cutting room as we the audience are viewing it for the first time. He has probably seen the scene several times so he fast forwards it!!!

Boyhood Dreams of Suiting Up Come True

Brian James — Sun, 28 Sep 2008 23:56:45 -0400

There is something purely endearing about the suit-up scene in The Pride of the Yankees.

Freshly recruited Lou Gehrig, played magnificently with a boyish wonder by Gary Cooper, arrives early to the locker room before his first home game as a NY Yankee. He even pauses to consider the door upon entry that states 'Yankees - Positively No Admittance'! His dream has come true at last...

"Where is the horse and the rider..."

Dennis — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 02:57:49 -0400

Plain and simple, this scene gives me goosebumps. It's one of the most beautiful suit-ups ever committed to film. Director Peter Jackson is brilliant in all aspects of his film-making, but it was his strict loyalty and love of the books of J.R.R. Tolkien that made 'The Lord of the Rings' trilogy such a treat.

From a person whose read said books over five times already, this scene in 'The Two Towers' holds a special place in my heart. But we'll get to that in a second.

What!? No leather high heeled boots!?

Dennis — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 19:37:12 -0400

I can't decide if I'm going to be angry while writing this review, or effected, in a witty, ironical way. You see, in 'The Notorious Bettie Page' there is a suit-up scene. Well, of course there is. It's on this page, isn't it? But it's not the suit-up scene you or I thought it was. And I guess for that reason, I feel duped. And perhaps a little disappointed, in a perverse kind of way. I mean, c'mon, it's Bettie Page, the fetish icon of the 1950s.

The Prototype Suit-Up Scene

Kirk — Mon, 03 Nov 2008 00:46:05 -0500

This suit-up scene is so epic, I don't even know where to begin.

First off, I'd like to say that this is to me, the prototype suit-up scene. In fact, this is the suit-up scene that inspired me to create this site. As a kid, Commando was easily one of my favorite movies. This is Schwarzenegger at his best. Everything about his character, John Matrix, is what a growing boy wants to be.

The Ho Train Caboose

Brian James — Fri, 03 Oct 2008 14:05:35 -0400

Georgia Sykes (Keys) and her partner Sharice (Henson) are preparing for the biggest gig they have ever booked in their budding assassin careers: to smoke Aces.

From the aptly titled film, Smokin Aces, a voyeuristic suit-up scene moved from three stars to four the more I considered it's theme and character development.

The scene opens with Georgia slapping a clip into a handgun -- an inviting suit-up scene from the start. She is in a hotel room at the Nomad, several floors below where Buddy 'Aces' Israel is hiding out in his swank penthouse suite.

Suiting up to The Bee Gees

Dennis — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 18:26:41 -0400

In the year of my birth, a movie came out which, cinematically, was a landmark. A box office smash. And the introduction to one of Hollywood's greatest Scientologists: John Travolta. But musically, this same film would mirror an age of Americana best left forgotten, but never so well praised and captured. The disco era!!!

This film was (and still is), "Saturday Night Fever".

Who Knew Butchers Were So Bad Ass?

Kent — Sun, 12 Oct 2008 16:23:55 -0400

When you think of your local butcher you probably think of a fat italian guy with a stained apron behind the counter of a small counter, cutting up meat. In the case of Leon in The Midnight Meat Train, we see the wimpiest man become the baddest butcher of all... the human butcher.

Walking into the cold dirty meat packing warehouse, where his enemy has been working for so long, Leon (Bradley Cooper) finds his tools, and almost instinctively knows how to use them and wear them, despite being a vegetarian his whole life.

Hot Asian In Police Woman Uniform

Dennis — Sun, 12 Oct 2008 19:06:29 -0400

Okay, so I've watched a movie called 'Raped By An Angel 2: The Uniform Fan'. Shit, I own the damn thing. Does this make me a pervert? Or a well-versed lover of foreign cinema? The two actually go hand in hand sometimes.

With this film, that's not the case. I bought it because I'm a pervert.

Suiting up to blow your brains out

Dennis — Mon, 13 Oct 2008 15:47:49 -0400

Rob Reiner's 'A Few Good Men' is one of those films I've seen probably over thirty times. Not because it's a personal favorite. But because it seems to always be playing on TV. That's not such a bad thing. It's a good film with some intense court room scenes. It's also got Tom in full "Cruise Control". (you'll hear more about this in future reviews). But, lo and behold, it also has a suit-up scene.

Good Cruise Control = Good Suit Control

Dennis — Mon, 13 Oct 2008 16:24:27 -0400

I think my review title alone was reason to do a write-up on 'The Last Samurai'. Love him or hate him, Tom Cruise has led a dominant career in some very kick ass movies. He's one of those actors that seems like he can do anything. I picture his agent going to toss a script into the trash, and Cruise going, "Wait. What is that one about" The Agent replies, "Tom, trust me on this one. You play a priest who joins and then leads an Olympic bob-sledding team. It's ridiculous. We wouldn't be able to make it work."

To which Cruise responds, "Oh, we'll make it work..."